Which is Harder: School or Post-Grad Adulthood?

This post was inspired by a (now deleted) poll on r/Cornell, the highly active independent subreddit for the Cornell community.

I initially started writing this blog post in 2022 right after I had graduated from my university studies. However, as I was drafting the bullets to each argument, I realized that I hadn’t lived enough of my post-grad life to make an accurate observation or judgement. Now that almost 2 years of work life have passed, I can better assess this question.

School Life is Harder and Post-grad Life is Easier

• Academics are stressful; good grades are hard to get.
• Sleep, study, social — the trifecta that is known to be impossible to balance and usually one or the other gets sacrificed. After graduating, I won’t have to study again.
• It feels like all of my time is spent studying and there’s no time for true “fun”. Stress is almost constant. When I start having a job that pays (the optimal outcome), I’ll finally be able to spend money and indulge in desires.
• Studying for a degree doesn’t mean that my career is even going to anything related to that degree. “What’s the point?”
• I felt drained and unable to pursue hobbies that brought me joy when the stress of maintaining grades and extracurriculars was placed at a higher priority.

Post-grad Life is Harder and School Life is Easier

• There is no structure to my day, most things are self-motivated — and when there’s a lack of that, it’s easy to feel lost. With school, at least I know there’s the light at the end of the tunnel (graduation).
• Because there is no structure, there’s no one telling me what is right or wrong. There are no rules to follow (unless they are company policy or societal laws). I have to decide what I spend my time on.
• Even if I never have to study, there is still a need to keep my skills sharp for my career advancement.
• Being an adult comes with adult responsibilities, like planning for retirement and being financially responsible with long-term life goals in mind.
• Maintaining friendships becomes more intentional. I’m no longer living a 5–10-minute walk away from my friends. People become busier with their lives and other commitments.

Looking back in hindsight at my time in school and what’s happened in my own life over the past 2 years. I think one thing is for certain — I feel like I’m getting to know myself more and getting closer and closer to finding what motivates my core. I feel like I’m getting closer to finding that fulfillment. I’m acting on my dreams and spending the time on things I enjoy.

My time in undergrad gave me an opportunity to meet people and learn some skills. I wasn’t the best test-taker or the most studious; however, I carry my experiences with me, and they inform how I learn new material these days. Maybe a lecture isn’t the best format for me; maybe hearing a song or learning by doing is more effective. I find that when I’m truly motivated, I can find the resources and put the time in to learn what I need to know — even if it is watching a YouTube lecture or reading a chapter in a book.

Perhaps the time that I spent in school was useful in that it’s given me a way to fund my pursuits. I think that’s what a lot of people end up doing when they hit a crisis after university. Not everyone went to school pursuing their passions and they know it. It’s one thing to actually enjoy a career in a specific field, and another to only enjoy the idea of pursuing a career in that field.

As for social life? I find maintaining friendships to be about the same difficulty. It’s harder to meet people passively for sure, but depending on your day-to-day activities doing what you love, you’ll be meeting people through them anyway.

Is school life harder or is post-grad adult life harder? I think they’re both hard for different reasons. Adult life is harder if you haven’t answered for yourself, “What makes you fulfilled?” School life is hard because there are so many expectations on specific outcomes to achieve.